


only know you love them ( when you let them go )

by canarywest



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, I'm Sorry, M/M, Multi, My First AO3 Post, cisco gets left, dante is in this for a brief second and he isn't a dick???, i broke cisco, my first fic ever??, people leave, this is super angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-19 00:31:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14225205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canarywest/pseuds/canarywest
Summary: Everyone leaves. Cisco knows. He's been left a lot. It's only until they leave that he truly knows he loves them.or in which everyone leaves, and Cisco has no one but himself.





	only know you love them ( when you let them go )

It starts when he's five.

When stupid Beckett Bertelli leaves him on the playground, a young Cisco staring down at the mulch beneath the swings, claiming him to be, "not cool," and that, "he was too weird." He didn't know why it affected him so much, maybe, because of Beckett being the first friend he's ever had around his age? Whatever it was, he remembers going home to his mama that evening, tears streaming down his face as he told her how, "Beckett doesn't like me, mama."

He remembers his mother's kind words as she hugs him tightly, saying, "Oh, mijo, sometimes people leave, but you learn that true friends won't leave you."

That was the first time someone left Cisco Ramon.

* * *

 

The second time, Cisco is in high school, figuring out what he likes, and who he likes. He's stayed away from sex though. Who would want to have babies, when you could be building the future? He thinks it's weird how sex crazed most teenagers are. Maybe it's like a drug?

High school, is when Calvin leaves. Calvin Blake, Cisco's first crush, the guy who made him realize he was bi. His family moved to Miami the summer of Cisco's sophomore year. He wasn't mad ( okay, maybe he was a little mad ) but, there were other fish in the sea. At least that's what oh-so-perfect Dante told him after Calvin and his family had left.

"Dante," started a fifteen year old Cisco, draped across the couch in the living room as he plays with the t.v remote.

"Yes?" Dante asks, his nose buried in a book for one of his classes.

"Do you think I'll ever find love again?"

"Yeah," starts Dante, as he sets his book down to look at his younger brother, "There are plenty of other fish in the deep sea."

* * *

 

He's standing in front of Caitlin, his hand grabbing into the fabric of the shirt she's wearing. She looks down at his hand for a moment, then her eyes meet his.

"Let me go, Cisco." Her voice has a tone of sadness in it, as if she doesn't want to go, but he respects her wishes and lets go of her hand anyway.

He watches as she walks away. Her hair, now a shade of platinum blonde, falling in curls down her back as she walks. He watches, as he loses another one of his best friends. He's lost HR, who even though he claimed to be a general annoyance, was a pretty great friend. He's lost Dante, and he thought he couldn't hold on, but he did, because of Caitlin. Caitlin, who promised to never leave. Now she's leaving, and Cisco doesn't know if he can be strong and hold on this time.

She was the first true friend that left him.

* * *

 

 

This time it's Barry, and he's sacrificing himself to the speed force. Cisco doesn't want to let go, not this time. But he has too. It's Barry's choice to go. He whispers something about staying strong to Iris, but Cisco knows that she'll break down when she gets home. It's what he would do. No, it's what he is going to do. He'll probably make it about three steps into his hobbit apartment, until his body crashes to the floor, shaking with each sob.

It feels numb. He can briefly remember that feeling from when Dante died but this? This is new.

This time it's his best friends, his family. But he has Iris, and he knows that he has a friend on the team, that he isn't alone.

* * *

 

Then Iris leaves, only three months after Barry did, on the exact same day, and there's screaming, and yelling, and crying and, Iris saying "Have a nice life Cisco," and he can't hold his feelings in anymore. He realizes that he loves each of them. Not as friends, but as something more.

Maybe in another life the four of them could be together, but he remembers that you only know you love someone, when you let them go.

**Author's Note:**

> All I have to say is, I'm sorry! And, I hope you like it!!


End file.
